Deliberate Practice

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I've been thinking a lot about how we develop skills recently, and why we're toned to certain things. For a while now I've had a few words by Adam Savage in my head; 'if you want to learn a new skill apply to it to a project' - because it gives it meaning and directs your attention on something (and increases your ability at the same time). I think on those words and reflect on the various things I've failed to achieve in the past because I was just learning them without having a concrete goal at the end. I'm sure it's a familiar story: you go to learn something but because you can't focus on a goal the attention might be there but it's not honed, so it gets spread out and eventually wipes away your desire. Commonly people feel this with learning a language, or in learning to draw. 

But there's also a difference between practice and deliberate practice. Practicing drawing in itself almost isn't enough, it kind of needs to be more deliberate than that. Instead of 'I think I'll do some sketching tonight' it needs to become 'I'll finish x amount of sketches in this style, or study this form and produce at least one interpretation on it'. The difference is vast and so is the chasm you need to cross to get into the latter. When I was making Finding Shouko I had a clear focus and deadline which really allowed to learn difficult skills like Android coding. But now that it's finished I find myself without purpose. I sit down to draw and I want to do it because I'm finally free to do whatever I want, but I there's an inherent double-edge-ness to this freedom. 

I need to shift my practice into something more deliberate and focused - which isn't an easy thing to do. It requires commitment and discipline; both of which I have, but I'm also little worn out after working so long on this project. But then at the same time I get angry at myself, or feel lazy when I just play games or just sit around relaxing. I guess I'm a bit frustrated right now and this is a good way to voice that. 

Another element is recognizing that skill takes time to develop. When you transition from child to teenager to adult you kind of forget this process of things taking time to develop, because during those stages things came 'naturally' (you just didn't realize the time you spent doing certain things). And that's the problem with discipline, it quickly turns into judgement when you don't progress or produce things you can see in your head but your hands can't quite translate. I think it's more important to keep the things you judge unworthy and use them as building blocks - stronger than you were yesterday, over and over. If the mistakes you make aren't there to be reflected on they'll only be repeated because you're not conscious of your judgement. Whilst self-judgement is always extreme and harsh, I think it's actually a mechanism for learning.

'You messed that up. Don't do it again. If you do, I'll hate on you.'

This swaying of mood and emotion is a punishment/reward system that you have to learn to use to your advantage. Until then you'll experience high-highs and low-lows, but once you start adapting to the system you'll learn that the punishment doesn't have to be harsh, but rather the importance lies in the lesson learnt - which in itself is a reward, because you've learned something. You've gained more experience and become stronger than you were yesterday.

Sometimes learning a new skill is doing absolutely everything wrong, over and over. Or sometimes it can be doing something not quite to the standard you want, over and over. Only by going through this system of 'not good enough' do you start becoming 'good enough'. And it's a sliding scale. What is good now might be not so good in the future, because skill is a sliding scale from bad to good to great to amazing. And this is greatly reflected in the work you see on DA everyday: those that are starting, those that are learning, those that are experimenting, and those that are producing. 
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